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Twin Cities Mom Collective

Realities of Pregnancy: A First Timer’s Open Thoughts

Hey all!  My name is Lauren and I am a 29-year-old pregnant lady that lives in South Minneapolis.  This will be my first baby so I’m experiencing a lot of “firsts” with pregnancy – and am learning about the raw and real reality of the process.  Now, I feel like a lot of women study up on this sort of thing before they become pregnant or they asked their friends all about it.  Somehow I missed that memo and entered into this 9-month marathon unarmed with knowledge.  That being said, I thought I’d share a few things with you that I wish I would have known.  Hopefully this entertains you.

So…what do I wish I would have known going into pregnancy?

People no longer make eye contact with you – it’s like your stomach is your new eye line and people feel like they can’t break the gaze with my belly button.  I was standing in line at Potbelly when I was about 18 weeks pregnant (i.e. not THAT pregnant yet) and a stranger lady in line stared straight at my belly for 30 seconds…standing 5 feet away from me.  Um…hello?  I see you!

IMG_1148 Maternity clothes shopping (releases deep sigh) – this has been by far my least favorite part of pregnancy and I wish I would have known how sad it is to shop for maternity clothes.  To give some context, you should know that I absolutely love clothes and putting outfits together.  My job revolves around apparel – so it’s a big focus in my daily life.  Once my regular jeans started pinching my insides and my shirts were all turning into crop tops (to accommodate a growing bump), I decided it was time to shop around for some maternity clothes.  I checked out the usual suspects – Gap, Old Navy, Macy’s and Destination Maternity.  Now it’s nothing personal, but are there seriously only 2 maternity styles available (Option #1-tent; Option #2-empire waist)? I was slightly devastated after returning from my first shopping trip empty handed (rare occurrence in my life).  I kind of felt like crying – but I’ll chalk that up to the extra hormones because crying over failed shopping is kind of embarrassing.  Anyway, I persevered through the next few months applying the trusty hair binder method until it was on the verge of an embarrassing “snap” and decided to hit up the maternity stores for round 2 of shopping.  I guess it was some sort of miracle, but I found a few pairs of jeans that looked fairly normal and weren’t over $100 each.  I still struggle with the shirt selection, but have found luck just buying non-maternity clothing in larger sizes.  Who says you have to limit yourself to only tents and empire waist shirts?  I declare war on maternity shirts. 

Stranger belly rubs – it’s true.  They happen.  My first stranger belly rub was not a complete stranger, but rather a friend’s dad whom I had only met one other time in my life.  He didn’t even say hello nor look me in the eye when he walked up (note the comments above about eye contact with the belly) and went straight in for an aggressive belly grab.  Not even a gentle rub, but a full-blown holding of my belly.  It got weird really fast, but sadly only on my end.  He was enjoying holding my unborn child for a moment.  I couldn’t speak – just managed to keep breathing and survive the moment.  Phew…

Boobs grow too – Seriously, who knew?  When I first heard that, I was like, “Oh, that won’t be too bad of a side effect.” But now that I’m living through it… no thank you!  Not only are clothes tight in my belly, but also in my chest.  And I have to consider the cleavage effect going on with my shirts – something I’ve never had to think about before. (This is obviously my opinion and I happen to be an awkwardly modest person when it comes to the cleavage factor…so yeah…this may just be my issue.)

IMG_1187I now acknowledge that my body was pretty awesome before – even after I ate that Chipotle burrito…and chips/guac…and a Coke.  I wouldn’t have thought so back then (i.e. pre-bun-in-the-oven-days). Yeah, that burrito belly is nothing compared to this baby belly, and I now can acknowledge I looked pretty darn good back then…even with a temporary burrito baby bulge.

But all in all, I don’t really wish I knew anything more (maybe even less) because it causes anticipation, anxiety and establishes a “normal” that I absolutely will not fit into and then will worry why I’m not normal.  Yes, it’s best to take it one day at a time and consult with trusted friends that have been through it – or not been through it and can tell you that you’ll be fine anyway.

So my advice to expecting moms or hopeful expecting moms – identify other women in your life that have been through pregnancy that you trust with your “embarrassing” questions.  I can’t tell you how many questions I’ve texted to my sister to ask her about this or that (I’ll spare some of the details).  That’s it.  Just find a person.  Someone to tell you “yes, that’s normal” to basically everything you ask…because let’s face it… we all have a different experience because we all have different bodies. But it’s a crazy experience.  And I love it!

 

photo-22Lauren and her her husband, Josiah, live in South Minneapolis.  They have been married for three and a half years and are expecting their first baby (a boy!) in late January.  Outside of work, you can find Lauren grabbing coffee or dinner with friends at local restaurants, feeding her shopping habit, or helping her husband fix up their home.  She is just starting her blog, The Middle Girl Blog – stop by to see the latest updates.

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