I am Jenn, I blog over at A Style Portrayed. My husband and I had our daughter 2 years ago and am hoping to get pregnant this year. I own my own business and I do what I love.
Sometimes things can get placed on the back burner and it’s usually a friendship that “I just don’t have time for”. A couple years ago, I got so busy that when it calmed down I realized it had been over a month since I had talked to my closest girlfriend! This was unacceptable in my opinion. Something had to change and that something was me. I decided that from that day forth I was going to stop consuming my thoughts with myself and create intimate friendships. Here is part of the journey I went on.
1. Find Friends:
I am part of a group of 15-20 girlfriends. It wasn’t practical to get close to all of them, so I choose 3 ladies that I wanted to dig deeper with. This number seemed manageable to me. I knew I could actually follow through with this number and not get overwhelmed with commitment. I believe we are suppose to do life with other women. Men are wonderful but they are different. A good girlfriend is hard to replace and I was craving them in my life. It was time I start being that good girlfriend! So, I picked a few ladies to get closer to. I didn’t tell them that I picked them, I just started reaching out to them.
2. Be Intentional:
I reached out and started making plans with them. Coffee, lunch, shopping, wine date…you name it I planned it! I form friendships by talking and creating bonds over similar interests. I loved these times together and still do. I asked a lot of questions. It was fun learning their life experiences and bonding over them. I have a friend whose goal this year is to be intentional about celebrating her friends. Sending birthday cards, anniversary cards, etc. I loved this goal and it inspired me to be more intentional with my close girlfriends and send them cards just because they are amazing! It will be fun
3. Be Open:
This one isn’t always easy for me. I am glad I took the risk to be vulnerable and open up about my life. I decided to take a chance with these friends. When one would ask how my day was I would tell them the truth. I no longer answered the question with fine or great. If my day was crappy or I had something to celebrate, I shared it. Now, when I have something that has caused some pain in my life, I truly have ladies who I can turn to. It feels amazing to go through life this way. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there, the best bonds come from being vulnerable. When I became vulnerable, my friends did too.
4. Stay Connected:
We don’t always have hours to spend with our friends but I enjoy it when they check in on me and I on them. It can be a simple text, call or email. Not all of my friends communicate the same way. I’ve learned to adapt my ways of communicating. If it’s someone that I want to get close to, I will initiate conversation the way they like to receive it.
Female friendsips are a very special thing. The friendships I have formed will withstand circumstances and time. These women help me keep my sanity, hold me accountable and remind me of what is important. “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another” Proverbs 27:17
xo,
Jenn
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