Mom Must-Haves

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From the carseat to the crib to the highchair, there is the “must have” list that every mom has. For months on end (or perhaps weeks if you’re a procrastinator like me) you set yourself up to make sure you have the essentials and are as prepared as possible for baby’s arrival.

Before baby, I thought all my must-haves would be taken care of by the expert big-box baby stores. I could prepare for everything possible thanks to Babies”R”Us and Buy Buy Baby. It turns out, my must-haves didn’t come from my registry, but rather from experience and what I have found to be the most valuable in my 10 months so far as a new mom.

Here are my mommy must-haves:

1) Baby carrier.

Okay, so this is something you can buy yourself or put on your registry, but it didn’t come from mine. I was gifted one from my husband’s cousin, and I seriously feel like it’s the best thing since sliced bread.

There really is nothing better than holding and snuggling your squishy baby, but Momma also has to get stuff done. Enter the baby carrier. It’s great for when baby is being extra clingy, or when you just want to hold and keep an eye on the baby while doing something else. I have worn my baby girl as I’ve dusted the house, folded laundry, and made cookie dough. (Practice safe babywearing and don’t cook while wearing baby.)

Mommy Must-Haves, Baby Carrier, Mom Friends, Patience, Gratitude
Babywearing with baby girl earlier this summer.

Baby carriers are also great for going places where you may have to navigate a crowd, like the Iowa State Fair or the Downtown Farmers’ Market. I love being outdoors and babywearing – my little girl and I frequently take walks around the neighborhood.

You can get a baby carrier without breaking the bank, whether you buy used at a consignment store like Once Upon a Child or Me ‘n Mommy to Be, or if you purchase an off brand. Whatever style or brand you choose, you won’t regret it. I do recommend purchasing a style/type that can grow with baby and be used for more than just a few months. Or, consider signing up as a member of Babywearing International of Central Iowa, where as a member you can rent up to 12 carriers from their lending library (one per month) for only $30 a year.                       

2) A mom friend who has been around the block a few times.

This has been invaluable to me. I don’t know what I would do without the advice and the “it’s totally normal” reassurance from my friends who have done this a few times before. From questions about diaper rashes to bodily functions to baby sleeping habits, I have friends I can count on to have first-hand, expert advice that I wouldn’t get from a book or the Internet.

It’s also refreshing to be around these friends with my little girl because they know what it’s like as a new mom, and I don’t have to be embarrassed by a meltdown or an epic diaper disaster. They understand my obsessive need to post way too many pictures of my daughter on the Internet, and they listen as I share stories about her newest tricks and milestones.

3) A friend who is single or who doesn’t have kids yet.

These friends remind me that there is more to what defines me than being a mom. Granted, I am Momma first and foremost, but I am still me with my own interests and hobbies, like writing. With these friends, we talk about things together that don’t involve questions about baby bodily functions or looking at pictures of what my girl ate for breakfast that morning.

These friends are also the ones who text me and ask if I want to have a girls’ night. Um, heck yes! A friend invited me to her house a couple weeks ago for homemade margaritas and the company of other great friends. Is it me or are girls’ nights out essential for moms? I think we too easily forget to take time for ourselves, and I am thankful for my friends who remind me it’s okay to do that.

4) Patience. Lots and lots of patience.

Being a mom is hard. It requires being patient through a lot of processes and trying times, like frequent night wakings or crying for no reason or understanding your own hormonal, postpartum mess of a self. All you can do through times like these is to realize that as a mom, you have a strength that you never had before. You have a love, an unconditional desire to care for your child through anything.

When times get so hard that all you want to do is question yourself and wonder why you ever wanted to make this decision in the first place, take a step back and breathe. Be patient with yourself. You are not perfect and that’s okay.

Though the road may seem windy and unending, each phase is just that: a phase. You will get through it. You’ll come out on the other side stronger than you ever thought you could be. Because you are an awesome mom.

5) Gratitude.

This tops my list of must-haves. It can be easy to get bogged down by to-do lists and feeling like you’re not doing all that you can as a mom. It’s even easier to get frustrated and overwhelmed by the chaos that children bring into your world.

Here’s a newsflash for you: you’re not going to do it all, and that’s okay. You’re going to lose your patience every now and then, and that’s okay, too. As much as we want to be perfect as moms, we’re going to make mistakes. We’re not going to do everything right.

But instead of dwelling on everything that we are not, we must dwell in what we are and what we have. I am so incredibly grateful to have an amazing partner to share my life with, and my gratitude overflows for the blessing that is our baby girl.

Even though most days I fall short of my own expectations as a mom, I am thankful and blessed to be able to be called Momma.

What mommy must-haves not found on your baby registry have become your most valuable?


Meet Guest Blogger Kristin Schaaf

Kristin Schaaf headshotKristin is a blessed wife to her husband David and first-time momma to her daughter Hannah, embracing the ups and downs of motherhood and the joys and challenges each day brings. She enjoys spending time with her family and friends, writing, baking, and being involved in her church. Kristin shares her heart and experiences as a mother through letters to her daughter on her blog, Dear Baby with Love.

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